But Jesus answered them, saying: “The hour is come that the Son of man should be glorified. Amen, amen I say to you, unless the grain of wheat falling into the ground die, itself remaineth alone. But if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit. He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world, keepeth it unto life eternal. If any man minister to me, let him follow me; and where I am, there also shall my minister be. If any man minister to me, him will my Father honour.” John 12: 23–26Dear Daughters of St. Philip Neri,
Are you willing to follow the Lord into the hiddenness of prayer; allowing yourself to sink into the darkness of an absolute faith? More, are you willing to completely die to self and to lose yourself in adoration? For you must let go of all that the senses cling to and that to which reason and understanding hold fast for security; forgoing what even seems to be soundness and stability of mind.
For it is only in imitation of your Beloved, by allowing yourself to be buried in the rich ground of faith, by dying to any sense of yourself outside of Him, will you bear much fruit. Can you let yourself consent to disappear, to become what you contemplate, to be forsaken by all and wrapped in silence? It is only then that you will enter into the Silence that is Life and the glory that is not of this world.
There is a very real sense in which the prayer of adoration is a loss of one’s life. It is a kind of falling into the ground to die. Remember this when you come to adore Me. Look at the Sacred Host and see Me, who am the grain of wheat fallen into the ground and risen to life, and become the food of a vast multitude of souls, and this until the end of time. The grain of wheat that I was has become the Host that I am.
When you adore Me, forgetting yourself and forsaking all things for Me, you imitate Me, for adoration is a kind of death. It is a passing out of everything that solicits the senses and a cleaving to Me alone in the bright darkness of faith. So it will be in the hour of your death.
The more deeply you sink into adoration, the more deeply are you planted in the earth, there to die, and there to sprout, and finally to bring forth much fruit.
Sink into the ground of adoration. Consent to disappear, to forsake appearances, and to die. Enter into the silence of the Host. Become by grace what you contemplate in faith. Here, I am hidden, silent, and forsaken by all, save a very few whom I have chosen to enter into My hiddenness, My silence, and My solitude. If you would serve Me, follow Me into My Eucharistic state. Lose all that the world counts as something and become with Me something that the world counts as nothing.
“Where I am, there also shall my servant be.” You are here because I am here and was here before you. Adoration is the humblest and, at the same time, the most fruitful expression of service. To adore Me is to serve Me, and “if anyone serve Me, my Father will honour him.” When you adore Me, you serve Me, and in serving Me, you are united to Me who hide Myself, and give Myself, and reveal Myself in this Sacrament. This is the life of adoration: it is the mystery of the grain of wheat buried and hidden in the darkness of the earth. It is the promise of life in abundance and a foretaste of the face-to-face vision that awaits you in glory.
In Sinu Jesu
A Journal of a Priest at Prayer